How we speak matters.

I agree that we have free speech.

Speech has consequences though.

Free speech doesn't mean you get to avoid the consequences of your speech.

We should not limit speech. We should not compel speech. But we should educate ourselves on how speech impacts our communities.

This past weekend we saw another shooting. A hate crime against a marginalized community. Speech had a lot to do with it.

How we speak matters.

The shooting at Club Q hit me the way so many of these senseless shootings hit me.

Obvious things pass through my mind.

How do we regulate firearms like we regulate vehicles?

How do we improve our criminal justice system to provide better healthcare?

But it also hit me on a more personal level.

Sam and I loved living in Colorado Springs.

We had all three of our kids in that town. It is a community filled with wonderful people.

Though we have moved away it will always be a part of us.

But it is even deeper.

Ever since I can remember I have had strong connections to crossdressing.

I can vividly remember the euphoria of wearing tights in my sophomore year of high school during our theater production of Cinderella.

In college, I dressed in drag for Halloween and had a transformative experience.

With the arrival of my children and the personal reflection that event brought on then powered up by COVID I started on a bigger journey into incorporating crossdressing into my daily and now public life.

I know why I delayed it.

I know why in the beginning Sam was so terrified.

I can remember the way the other boys described having to wear panty hose during Cinderalla. They didn't mince words.

I can remember hearing conversations and the way people spoke about the queer community growing up in church, boy scouts, and at school.

A lot of people talk about disgust.

I have felt that disgust firsthand.

I lost my virginity and fell madly in love with a girl in my Junior year of college who later called me a faggot and dropped me like a bad habit just for expressing myself and sharing that part of me with her.

It was dangerous then.

Even with all the progress our society has made, it is still dangerous.

How we speak matters.

Many good honest people I know have shared their religious and moral opinions on social media that are dripping with disgust.

Would they ever shoot up a gay bar?

No.

But many of the words and phrases they use are dog whistles to those who are slowly becoming radicalized by that speech.

Whenever you find yourself sharing your opinions and views on marginalized communities ask yourself am I speaking the way Jesus Christ spoke?

You don't have to accept what you view as sin but you should be able to humanize the sinner.

Just because they come from a different country and speak a different language doesn't mean you should forget the parable of the good Samaritan.

Jesus broke bread with tax collectors and sex workers and all other marginalized communities of the ancient world.

If you find yourself talking about marginalized communities using tropes, slurs, and generally painting with a broad brush remember your speech has consequences.

Should we limit free speech and compel people to speak a certain way?

No.

Should we cancel opinions and speech that we don't agree with?

No.

Should we understand that speech is powerful and the way we speak matters?

Yes.

If you find yourself in a moral rage with communities you aren't a part of try and remember we are all the same at our foundation.

We are all human.

We all deserve to be human.

Our religions, political beliefs, sexuality, gender, and race, etc etc etc don't change the fact that we are all human.

Remember that simple fact when sharing your speech about other humans.

It could save a life.